People with unusually high intelligence take in and acquire information differently, process that information differently. They frequently experience emotions and physical stimuli more intensely than others. They have motivations and drives which others often find odd or bizarre. In short, being unusually intelligent tends to create a whole life experience which is markedly more complicated and intense than what most people experience.
This is the one reason why most intelligent people are having hard time finding love. It may sound weird, but being intelligent and clever can also be a disadvantage for someone who thinks more.
The following facts explain why sometimes it’s so hard for intelligent people to fall in love and be in a serious relationship:
1) Intelligent people are more independent.
It’s a fact that the more intelligent a person is the more they value independence as a trait. That’s why they have a secret fear of commitment since they are afraid that a relationship may change their independent way of living. Of course that’s not true. A serious, meaningful relationship will never damage your independence. If your partner truly loves you and respects you as well, then they will never try to control your life. Love is not like prison.
2) Intelligent people are more suspicious.
When you think too much, there’s a possibility that you’ll start thinking bad things. Sometimes intelligent people fill their minds with insecurities. They can’t easily be fooled, but that’s exactly because they’re afraid of being fooled! They are too careful when they pick a partner or even a friend and that’s why they end up being alone for long periods of time. Of course, being too naive isn’t good either, but being too suspicious can only trouble you more.
3) Intelligent people focus more on their careers.
Smart people want to succeed in life and that’s completely respectable. However, the fact that they focus on their job sometimes leaves them with no time left for having a social life. That’s why smart people are the ones who are somewhat “late” to settle down. I don’t really see anything bad with that, since we all choose to make some little “sacrifices”.
4) Intelligent people tend to think too much.
Sometimes, intelligent people are the ones who hurt themselves in a relationship. They tend to analyse every minor subject, so they create bigger problems. Overthinking can sometimes lead to endless fights in a relationship. It’s even worse if you don’t fight and you keep everything inside you; then it feels like you will choke. Try to relax and don’t think too much, because that only increased your anxiety.
5) Intelligent people are often perfectionists.
The previously mentioned characteristic of “thinking too much” is often combined with this one. Perfectionists want their lives – and, as a matter of fact, their relationships – to be completely flawless. You just need to understand that this is not always possible. In fact, most of the times your life will be imperfect. But isn’t that the perfection of life?
6) Intelligent people don’t fall in love that easily.
The reason is really simple: intelligent people value intelligence in others as well. So appearance is not really important. They need to truly know the other person, their hobbies and their personality, to decide if they’re the one. That’s understandable. However, if you are an intelligent person, you should be careful; if you waste too much time deciding if the other person is the right partner, they might run away and then you’ll end up alone.
7) Intelligent people trust their minds more than their hearts.
A mind, especially a clever one, can sometimes confuse the heart. There are some simple moves to make your heart and mind work together: Firstly, learn the advantages and disadvantages of the mind. To a certain point, rational thinking is beneficial, but it can sometimes go overboard. Then, learn to discern your heart from your rational mind. Listen to your heart. Your inner voice may not always be clear, but it’s trying to tell you something. Learn how to listen to it. To start, you’ll need to temporarily drown out our rational thought processes and focus on the voice.
The notion that intelligent people are more suspicious and perfectionist resonates with me. The struggle to balance rational thinking with emotional intuition is a challenge many face. However, the advice to listen to one’s heart is quite significant.
Indeed, the emphasis on emotional intuition is crucial. While rational thinking is a powerful tool, overly relying on it might create unnecessary barriers in forming connections.
I agree. It’s essential to strike a balance between heart and mind. Over-analysis can sometimes prevent us from experiencing genuine emotions and connections.
The article’s point about intelligent people not falling in love easily due to their valuation of intelligence in others is quite thought-provoking. It highlights the importance of shared values and intellectual compatibility in relationships.
The focus on career development as a factor in relationship difficulties is particularly noteworthy. In a world that increasingly values professional success, finding time for personal relationships can indeed be challenging for anyone, not just the highly intelligent.
I found the discussion on perfectionism particularly relevant. The idea that life’s imperfections contribute to its beauty is a valuable reminder. Striving for flawless relationships can lead to unrealistic expectations and dissatisfaction.
The article provides insightful points about the complexities faced by highly intelligent individuals in romantic relationships. It’s interesting to note how their need for independence and tendency to overthink can become obstacles.